Arnold Schwarzenegger's 'The Governator' Trailer

This week, former bodybuilder, action hero and governor of CaliforniaArnold Schwarzeneggerofficially announced his first project since returning to the entertainment business. Aspreviously reported, the 63-year-old is starring in“The Governator,” a fantastically ill-conceived plan to turn the recent politician into a cartoon crime fighter replete with enough high-tech gadgetry to make James Bond mighty jealous.

According toTHR, Schwarzenegger said the plan is to create comic books, then the cartoon series (trailer below), followed by games and an eventual 3D“Governator” movie.

The timing of the reveal is curiously close to April’s Fool Day, which feels right since the newly released trailer is so rife with unintended punchlines I’m not even sure where to start.

How about a cartoon for children based on a public figure that hasn’t acted in eight years? You know, for the adolescent fans of Arnold that might be too young to experiencePredator, but can now get to know an animated, faux-Arnold (dreamed up by comic legend Stan Lee) amidst the thrilling world of political retirements and quiet mansion living. Naturally, hip and totally relevant (former) TV newsman Larry King makes a cameo, whom Schwarzenegger promises will become a recurring character on the series. You mean kids will get Schwarzenegger (63)andKing (77) in one show? The AARP plotlines are endless!

But what’s this? Arnold has a secret vault hidden behind two sliding humidors(?) complete with decoder ring and retinal scan entry? What a glorious rip-off of every other underground lair. Inside— after traversing a futuristic tunnel and conveyor belt hallway, of course— is a war room of touch-screen monitors that initiate his“super suits” and a team of teenage sidekicks dazzled by a spinning hologram of their idol and surrogate grandfather.

I was literally on the brink of happy tears when the Black Eyed Peas’“Pump It” kicked in and sent me careening into a full on laugh fit so uncontrollable I may have pulled something. Only after I composed myself and re-watched the montage did I realize the soundtrack was for The Governator’s long-awaited clash with a gaggle of Decepticon knock-offs.

Cap it off with Schwarzenegger declaring,“I’m back.” Witness the glory for yourself:

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